My imagination is too vivid.

Sometimes i'll just daydream..
Happy dreams.. about that ideal situation.. person.. event..
A circumstance so lovely and yet so improbabale.. so irrational.. so wholly fictional and impossible.. 'as impossible as meeting Brad Pitt' as I like to say.
I know that I am completely making it up.. it is in no way achievable.. and yet I continue to daydream it.. over and over again because it gives me pleasure..it makes me happy

I should not do that.. i should not daydream about the impossible event..
the more i daydream the more real it seems to me.
I forget that it is a daydream.. that it is impossible.. because by then it has become a part of my life.
And i even hope for it... like as if I am pinocchio..

Its a waste of time.. and its dangerous.

But my own life.. is so boring in the romantic dept.. that i feel forced to think of these things.
I fear that real life will never be as good as this.

xxx

Im going through a phase where I would prefer my other half to be from any sort of artistic background.
I dont know maybe actor, writer, journalist..
I am not willing to risk stability and the funny thing is that i want someone who has.. someone who has risked much more than me because he's a guy.
And knowing me I shall want someone moderately successful.

Thats not right.. what about the poor risk taker who didnt really make it. I emphatize with him.. but would i be with him?
I guess I wouldnt mind as long as he is good at his work.. I couldnt be with someone who is not good at what he is doing..
I dont mind if he's not making too much money.. because I can make money.
But he should not be living off me.. thats all..
He should have enough for himself atleast.

Im selfish about my money.. ive noticed.

So this guy can keep me connected to the world of words and images.. fiction and passion.. which I love.. but which I cannot make a part of my career.. not only because it may not be stable.. but because its not my thing.. liking books and movies does not make you good at making them.

Moreover I have no desire to.