Yuck!

I cannot manage to get in to any institute.
I dont know how I will manage to get a job.

(Yes I just keep on saying only this again and again, because mostly I write to crib.. and this is the most crib-worthy aspect of my life, presently)

Fuck.

I just want to know where I am going.. get settled into some sort of cycle.
Because right now I feel absolutely worthles.. not a student.. not yet an employee.
Do you remember that Britney Spears song?

xxx

Anyhow.. How does one become a writer? Do I just write my story? Or is there any particular format?
And what to do about the embarassment??

See I shall only write about my life.. since its the only thing I can write truthfully about. And somehow.. whenever I sit to write a novel.. it sounds stupid to me.. and embarassing.

I can write about my anorexia.. ex-anorexia.. what went through my mind.. my inadequacies... How to deal with anorexics..
I don't think any of my counsellors, who were by the way supposed to be the best in the business.. knew how to deal with it effectively. I can give them tips.

Im not going to write about modelling coz there is nothing to say.. just lots of gossip.. no facts.