There's a big party today, being thrown by my Mama for my Nani's 85th birthday on the 10th of march. He always throws parties at the 'Piano Bar.'

I hate food.
But I love reading about it, although I limit myself.. because it makes you want to eat something. Its exactly like advertising.. creating unnecessary and previously non existent desires for things.

These desires serve a purpose. Demand creates jobs in the global economy. And the desires give one satisfaction. But the satisfaction is fleeting and unreal. It is so fleeting. Like the satisfaction you get from eating good food.

xxx

I think that my grandfather thinks that I am a mental case. When ever he see's my mom and me arguing and me getting terribly upset he'll always tell my mom to "Be more understanding. She has a problem," which is sweet.. but I feel like a mental case. Maybe people think that I am a mental case as they must think that I have strange thoughts and habits.

Should I tell you??

Ok... I don't care how mental you think I am.. but..

Like whenever possible I must jump 5 times after reading a page of a book.
Read a page, jump 5 times, read next page and jump 5 times and so on till page raise to n.

Why?
Well the only thing I do all day is read. I do not move. That feels slothful.. this is how I feel less slothful. I have spent a large part of my life striving to be ultra fit. Just sitting and reading the whole day feels sick. Many people might relate to this. So I jump, then I feel less guilty about doing nothing..

See people have kids to feel less guilty about doing nothing. People try to make themselves believe that work is the purpose of life, that there is a purpose to life, to feel less guilty about doing nothing. We all invent reasons and then do activities to feel less guilty about doing nothing in our lives.. do even I did. But my invention goes against the norm.. so I am a mental case.

And I am justifying myself.. I realise.. because who likes to feel like a mental case?
No one will get married to me.

xxx

Senseless acts... make perfect sense to the people committing them. So how many sensible things did you do today?